The Funniest Wedding Vows Perfect for Honest Couples

Make realistic promises to your partner at your wedding with these down-to-earth wedding vow ideas


Your wedding vows are arguably the most important promises you and your partner will ever make to each other.

These are promises which should reflect your personalities and your relationship, so if you’re writing your own vows, why not make them as realistic and honest as possible?

If you're looking for something a little different and a move away from the more traditional 'I do's', take a look at our relatable, down-to-earth and funny wedding vow ideas! 

The Hangover Wedding Vow

hangover vow

“I promise to make you a bacon sandwich when you're hungover” – Because everyone needs a bit of TLC after a heavy night.

READ MORE: Exciting Ways to Include Prosecco in Your Wedding

The Netflix Wedding Vow

netflix vow

“I promise to never watch the next episode on Netflix without you, no matter how much I want to” – Because no one deserves this kind of betrayal. (You may want to get this one in writing…)

The Washing-Up Wedding Vow

washing up vow

“I promise to wash up when you cook dinner” – Because marriage is all about compromise, right?

READ MORE: Things That Change After You Get Married

The Fashion Wedding Vow

fashion vow

“I promise to let you know when you're making a slight error in fashion judgement” – Because honesty is the best policy! (And also, we don't want to hang around with you wearing that T-shirt you've had since your teens... )

The Spider Wedding Vow

spider vow

“I promise to always get rid of the spiders, even though I’m more scared than you” – Because when you love someone, that’s just what you do.

READ MORE: 18 Arguments Every Engaged Couple Have

The Football Wedding Vow

football vow

“I promise to comfort you when your football team loses… again” – Because their passions are now yours too.

READ MORE: Wedding Tasks to do While Your Partner Watches Football

The Eating Out Wedding Vow

eating-out vow

“I promise to always order something you like so that we can share meals” – Because sharing is caring, after all. (Plus I secretly want some of your food too.)

READ MORE: 15 Things All Newlyweds Need to Know

The TV Wedding Vow

tv vow

“I promise to put up with your favourite TV shows if you put up with mine” – Because compromise is key, and yes, this does include Love Island.

READ MORE: Reasons Why Love Island's Chris Hughes is Husband Material

The Savings Wedding Vow

savings vow

“I promise not to spend all our life savings during the January sales” – Because there's more to life than ASOS (apparently...).

READ MORE: 39 Emotional Stages of Planning a Wedding

The Haircut Wedding Vow

haircut vow

“I promise to always notice when you get your hair cut” – Because being attentive shows you care.

READ MORE: 17 Thoughts Every Groom Has

The Chores Wedding Vow

bins vow

“I promise to take the bins out... occasionally” – And I mean, occasionally!

The Snoring Wedding Vow

snoring vow

“I promise not to hit you too hard when you're snoring in the night” – Because they don’t mean to be the most annoying sleeping human on the earth!

READ MORE: Sassy Wedding Memes You Need to See

The Chocolate Wedding Vow

chocolate vow

“I promise to buy you your favourite chocolate when you're sad (even if it takes two supermarket trips)” – Because chocolate is ALWAYS the answer.

READ MORE: Chocolate Wedding Ideas

The Hangry Wedding Vow

hanger vow

“I promise never to take my hanger out on you” – Because no one means what they say when they’re hangry. (This is more of an “I’ll try, but I can’t actually promise anything” type vow…)

The Anniversary Wedding Vow

anniversary vow

“I promise to remind you of our anniversary at least 2 days before” – Because you don’t want to find out what happens if you forget an anniversary.

READ MORE: The Complete Wedding Anniversaries Guide

The Instagram Wedding Vow


“I promise to take Instagram-worthy pictures of you” – Because everyone loves a husband who can get all the angles.

READ MORE: Our Favourite Celebrity Wedding Instagrams

The Selfie Wedding Vow

selfie vow

“I promise to always ‘like’ your selfies” – Because, is there any better way to support your partner?

READ MORE: Our Favourite Wedding Selfies

The Argument Wedding Vow

argument vow

“I promise to let you win the occasional argument, even when I’m right” – (We'll let you into a secret now, we're always right.)

The Tidy Wedding Vow

makeup vow

“I promise to put my make-up in its designated drawer if you pick your pants up off the floor” – Because, quite frnakly, no-one wants to look at piles of make-up brushes or pants

The Toilet Wedding Vow

toilet vow

“I promise to close the door when I go to the loo” – Because no one needs to see that.

The In-Laws Wedding Vow

inlaws vow

“I promise not to moan about visiting your parents at the weekend” – Because no matter how much they drive us up the wall, we're all family now.

The Driving Wedding Vow

driving vow

“I promise to agree that you really are the best driver on the road and always know exactly where you're going” – Because it’s not worth the argument…

The Bedtime Wedding Vow

bedtime vow

“I promise not to steal the covers (intentionally)” – Because now we’re married we suppose we can share...

If you've already tied the knot, but want these promises in your life, why not consider renewing your wedding vows?

Deciding what to wear to a wedding is a serious girl dilemma. Is it too dressy, is it too bridesmaid-y, is it dressy enough!?

We’ve selected some of the best (and most reasonably priced) wedding guest dresses that are all under £50 – making your life a lot easier.

Little Mistress Rose Print Dress - £29


Coming in at just £29, this gorgeous off-the-shoulder wedding guest dress is way under the £50 budget, and is perfectly designed to wear to a wedding

Lipsy Floral Wrap Dress - £40


This cute floral dress is perfect wedding attire. The pattern is girly and fun, yet sophisticated at the same time, and the fabric ruffles make it extra feminine. Red Lace Dress - £45


Be the lady in red at the wedding with this little number from The lace detail is super pretty and we love the flared sleeves – they’re so on trend right now!

New Look Grey Tulle Dress - £39.99


This floaty, tulle wedding guest dress is super glamorous – the speckles of glitter are a gorgeous addition. If you really want to dazzle at the next wedding you go to, this dress could be the one for you.

Little Mistress Two-Tone Dress - £28.00


The two-tone contrast on this dusty pink midi dress is really cute, we love the colour palette and the dainty spaghetti straps are the perfect finishing touch. Pair with a nude court heel to really embrace this look.

Dorothy Perkins Glitter Midi Dress – £26.25


If you’re an evening guest to a wedding, or attending a do that’s black tie themed, this is the perfect gown to wear. The rouched detail is flattering on the arms and the colour is so glam. Red Ruffle Dress - £48


This floral dress with black-lined ruffles really is as cute as a button. It’s a great way to wear a striking colour like red, to a wedding, whilst still keeping your look feminine and girly.

Little Mistress Metallic Disco Dress - £39


If you’re into your metallics, you’ll love this silver skater dress just as much as we do. The shape is fabulous and perfect for showing off your best moves on the dance floor at the wedding reception!

New Look Black and Gold Star Dress - £39.99


This wedding guest dress is literally what dreams are made of. It’s the perfect outfit for a winter wedding, the stars are adorably festive and who doesn’t love a bit of tulle every now and then?

Dorothy Perkins Pink Twist Dress - £15


Guests looking for a dress with both a fun element and a sophisticated shape will just adore Dorothy Perkins’ pink wrap dress. The colour screams party-girl and the shape is so flattering!

Dorothy Perkins Yellow Twist Dress - £15


The best thing about the pink twist dress is that they do exactly the same design in yellow, too! You can buy both of these beautifully bright dresses for just £30 and stun at two separate weddings…

Little Mistress Lilac Frill Dress - £25


This lilac bodycon dress is classy and stylish – the frills are really on trend right now and the colour is perfect for a spring or summer wedding.

Lipsy Floral Maxi Dress – £40


Another guest dress perfect for warmer weddings is this floral maxi design from Lipsy. It has a sulty leg split and cute cold shoulder detailing which we think is really pretty.

Little Mistress Pink Lace Dress - £49


This pale pink number is exquisite! The intricate lace design is stunning and how pretty is that illusion neckline? The scalloped hem will look amazing with sky-high heels too.

Lipsy V-Neck Wrap Dress - £40


Keep it classy at the next wedding you attend with this scarlet wrap dress from Lipsy. The ruched waistband is really flattering and will suit any body shape.

Lipsy Blue V-Neck Wrap Dress - £40


If red isn’t your colour, or if you love that dress so much you need another version, say hello to the fabulous cobalt blue version. The colour is vibrant and you can pair with a nude or black heel!

New Look Pink Sequin Dress - £34.99


Make a statement at the next wedding you attend in this pink sequin mini dress. It’s perfect for winter wedding season and can be dressed with a funky blazer and block heels for the ultimate party look. Printed Drop Hem Dress - £45


We love the fun-factor that comes with this stylish drop hem dress from The funky pattern and bright colours will make you stand out from the crowd at any wedding.

New Look Pink Skater Dress - £39.99


This jacquard skater dress from New Look has the most mesmerising metallic finish to it, and the cut-out back is just fabulous.

Little Mistress Cobalt Blue Dress - £25.00


At just £25, this midi-dress is an absolute steal. The rich colour is beautifully bold and the gathered knot on the waistline is such a pretty added detail!


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